Loathing
by Penskii
Summary: Remus Lupin was normally a kind man who tried to get along well with everyone. He didn't really hate anything, until Sirius Black brought home that stupid bike. SBRM Slash


**Warning! Caution! Danger! :** This story contains... Slash!, Meaning the implied romantic relationship between two people of the same gender. In this case, The author has chosen to state that Remus and Sirius are very much in LOVE with each other, in the way that you are not when you are just friends.  
If you do not wish to expose your closed mind to this type of love, please click the 'back' button on your browser and find something else to read.  
Thanks!

**Disclaimer:**Even growing up as a privileged girl in a small town who got everything she wanted, the Harry Potter characters do not belong to me. Anything even remotely recognizable (such as characters, items, or settings) from the series of books or the movies of the Harry Potter franchise (or even the upcoming theme park, toys, and various magazine articles) are not mine. Those wonderful things belong to J.K. Rowling and the collective Warner Brothers corporation.

_(Author's Notes, for the reader's convenience, at placed at the bottom.)_

* * *

_Loathing_

Remus Lupin was never the jealous type. He was kind to almost everyone, even if they didn't deserve it. Even on the nights of the full moon, he tried to be chipper. His friends loved him, and his change was no excuse to be mean or moody to anyone. While Remus might have had the odd dislike for a few things, like lemon tarts or when the ice melts too fast in your drink and ruins the flavor, he never truly hated anything.

That all changed when Sirius brought home that blasted motorcycle.

If there was one thing in the world that made Remus jealous or angry, the one thing that Remus really hated, it was that damn bike.

The night Sirius brought his most prized possession home, it was quite the special occasion. Or, well, was supposed to be, if that bike hadn't ruined the celebration of one year and three months of a beautiful union. Remus had been making Sirius's favorite dinner- Spaghetti and Meatballs, and had just finished pouring the sauce over the noodles when he'd heard the low rumble of the bikes engine.

Remus had been startled at first. The Ministry of Magic did not approve of werewolves due to some new Umbridge woman that had been recently hiried, and Remus imagined that the engine's roar was that of a collection truck coming to get him and lock him up. He had been so startled by the sudden loud noise that he slopped sauce all over his freshly washed counter and his 'Kiss the Cook' apron.

The noise stopped as soon as it had started, and Remus could hear the lock mechanism turning in the door. He pushed himself against the refridgerator, hands searching for his wand as his heart pounded in his chest. Fear turned to relief as Sirius Black walked through the door of the small flat he shared with Remus. In Sirius's hands was a large cake-box, and dangling from his lips were a set of keys. They weren't the keys Remus was used to seeing- the keys to beaten down black Dodge Challenger. That set of keys was easily recognizable by the small dog charm that hung from the keyring. This new set included one less key and a key-chain that said something like "Fucking with my bike can be hazardous to your health."

Sirius didn't notice Remus's shocked expression, or the fact that dinner was all over the floor. He spit his keys into the small key bowl resting on the kitchen table, sliding the cake-box next to it and making a beeline for Remus.

"Sirius? What was that nois-" Remus was interrupted by Sirius grabbing his hand and pulling him forcefully toward the door.

"Come on, Rem. I've got something wonderful planned. You'll love this! You've gotta see it, first. Tell me what you think and all, then we can go." Sirius's grip tightened as Remus grabbed onto the counter in an attempt to stay inside of the flat.

"Sirius, dinner is-"

"It can wait, Remus." Sirius interrupted, tugging on Remus. "Just come on, please?"

Remus, resolved as he was, could never resist Sirius Black's patented puppy dog face. The way his dark hair curled around his jaw as he pouted his lips. His sparkling eyes looking every so slightly up, and that soft whimper that resonated in Sirius's chest.

"Fine. Fine." Remus said, letting go of the counter and allowing himself to be pulled outside for, what he hoped, was an explanation to the loud noise and the new set of keys.

Once out of the door, Remus instantly saw Sirius's new pride and joy- The Motorcycle. It was large, painted a sleek black, with a sidecar wide enough to fit Hagrid.

"This..." Remus felt his voice wavering. All other words died in his throat. This was the source of the noise, and also Sirius's excitement. Just looking at it, Remus began to feel angry. Agitated. Sirius was the only one working- it was so hard for Remus to find a job. It wasn't that he complained, but he would have liked to contribute to the income. With only one paycheck coming in to support two people, saving was an absolute must.

There was no excuse to blow their life savings on something so selfish.

"She's beautiful, eh?" Sirius clapped a hand on his mate's shoulder, his eyes glassing over as he admired his new purchase.

"I know it cost us a fortune, but I can work overtime. We can both enjoy it. Go on-" Sirius gave Remus, who was still silent, a shove toward the bike. "Give her a feel."

"How..." Remus tried to speak again. He knew living with Sirius could be a pain sometimes, but he loved the man. This time, though, He could not work his mind around Sirius's reasoning for buying the bike. Remus certainly wasn't going to sit on such a dangerous machine. He didn't even see a helmet.

And, Remus was also bothered by the fact that it was their anniversary, even if not a significant one, and after all Remus did for Sirius there was no present waiting for him.

"Alright! Ready to go out? I've found a lovely spot where you can see the stars. Beautiful. I'll just leave you alone with Lola, that's her name, so you can get better acquainted. I've got to grab the keys, and something to drink. Be right back." Sirius was grinning, still under the impression Remus was fascinated by the bike.

Sirius was almost to the door of the shared flat when he could have sword he heard Remus say, very softly, "No."

He spun, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. "I'm sorry, darling, what?"

"I said..." Remus ground out, a little louder. "No."

"I don't seem to understand..." Sirius's voice had lost all of it's excitement, and was left with a soft confusion.

"Sirius. I'm trying to be nice. Trying not to complain. But this-" Remus gestured frantically to Sirius's new toy. "This is too much! We don't have the money for this! Hell, five years and we still wouldn't have the money for this!"

"Uh.." Sirius looked positively puzzled. He lifted his eyes to the night sky. Nope, not close to the full moon. Couldn't be that. Perhaps.. "Dearest, have you been drinking?" Sirius asked tentatively.

"DRINKING!?" Remus's voice was high and shrill. It was one of those rare moments in their relationship where Remus, who was the more feminine role, sounded like a girl.

"No. I've not been drinking. I'm just not keeping my thoughts to myself for once. How could you possibly be so selfish as to buy that-that thing!? Tonight we're supposed to be celebrating US! And you- you go out and get something that only you can ever enjoy! You only think of yourself!" Remus was panting a bit by the time he was finished yelling at Sirius, who just stood and looked dumbfounded.

Remus had never, ever been like this before. Well, unless it was dangerously close to the full moon, but even then Remus tried his hardest to be pleasant.

Sirius decided to try a different tactic, perhaps getting Remus to actually ride the bike would sway his opinion.

"Maybe if you gave the motorcycle a chance you-"

"I will never-" Remus spun, pointing a finger angrily at the bike, "Ever sit on that death contraption!"

With that so eloquently said, Remus stormed back inside the house and slammed the door behind him. This left Sirius outside, with no idea how to rectify the situation. In the course of their relationship, Remus had never been this angry. He couldn't think of a time when Remus had been this angry at all. Perhaps he had just bottled things up for too long, and Sirius had pushed him a little to far.

At the same time, Sirius had always been a little reckless, and could only see the pros to buying the bike. He had honestly expected Remus to love it as much as he had, and had absolutely no intention of returning it. Grumbling at his failed attempt at romance, Sirius trudged back inside having made the decision that Remus would just have to come around to the bike eventually.

Of course, once Sirius found Remus in the kitchen, he relayed this information to him.  
"The bike's not going. I'm keeping it."

Then, unfortunately for Sirius, he had to duck as a plate was thrown in his direction. Remus always had fascinatingly good aim.

He tried again, a little firmer. "If the bike goes, I go with it."  
Next came the pot, still full with sauce.

Before Sirius could get out 'Oh Hey, you made spagetti', Remus had started to leave the kitchen and only paused to tell Sirius he could sleep with that damn bike because Remus certainly wasn't going to sleep with him.

Oh, how Sirius Black hated sleeping on the couch. That meant no sex, too. Not that Sirius expected Remus to put out after the fight, but he liked to keep that door open. Being kicked out of bed closed that door and locked it.

The next morning Remus was a bit more personable. He felt bad for yelling the way he did. He had spent most of his night trying to think of how Sirius's misguided reasoning behind buying the bike wasn't all bad.

All he could come up with was that it was more environmentally friendly. But still, he loved Sirius a lot and he couldn't let one bad purchase ruin their relationship. If that was the case, their union would have ended when Sirius decided he needed a new leather coat and left Remus with canned ravioli dinner for a week. It always took more than one mistake for Sirius to learn his lesson, though, and Remus hoped that if he forgave Sirius that he would remember this the next time he wanted to buy something that would make their savings account cry.

"I'm sorry.." Remus said, sitting on the edge of the couch where Sirius was still half asleep.

"Nng...s'okay..." Sirius mumbled, rolling over and pulling the soft blanket up to his chin.

"I'm still angry...but...I shouldn't have yelled. It's just that, we've been saving for a better flat, and...well..I don't like it when you run off and buy such..er...well, things we don't need...and.." Remus bit his lip, trying to put his feelings into words.

"Issat coffee?" Sirius sat up, eyeing the peace offering Remus had brought with him.

"Yes." Remus sighed, passing Sirius the cup.

After a couple of sips, Sirius was more awake and more aware of what Remus was saying to him. Not that he hadn't been listening before, but it was a bit hard for Sirius to pay attention without the coffee in his system.

"I considered your feelings, you know." Sirius pointed out after a few moments of silence.

"Oh?" Remus could feel the anger bubbling in him, but like always he pushed it down.

"I thought it'd be nice to talk long romantic rides. You'd sit behind me, hold onto me. The vibrations from the engine pressing up against your-"

"I have other feelings aside from what those vibrations would do to me." Remus said, almost pitifully.

"I said romantic rides!" Sirius said, a bit loudly and with a hint of anger, bit Remus let it slide.

"Sirius, I suppose it's fine for a mode of transportation for you, but I really don't want to sit on it." Remus fidgeted as he spoke, picking stray strands of string from his pajamas.

"Why?"

"It frightens me, just a bit."

"Oh." Sirius looked down, his coffee suddenly becoming very interesting. "So, you won't give it a proper chance then?" Sirius sounded so hopeful, but Remus couldn't. Not this time. He shook his head and stood, walking off to make breakfast for Sirius and letting the argument drop.

If Sirius wanted that bike so badly, fine. Remus wouldn't have to ride it anyway, and he was sure the frivolous spending wouldn't happen again. The matter had been settled.

Until...

Sirius was spending an alarming amount of time with the bike. He would wake up early to clean it before work, or take it out on his day off. When Remus tried telling Sirius he was in the mood for a little lovin', Sirius was too absorbed in making sure he could see himself in the handlebars.

And the way he talked to it was disgusting.

"Oh, you're looking beautiful tonight, Lola."  
"Lola, I'm going to ride you hard."  
"Lola, the way you roar against me.."

It was presenting some awful intimacy issues when the truth of the matter was that Sirius was being more intimate with the bike than he was with Remus.

When Remus had brought the matter up one night over tea and dessert, Sirius had dismissed it before Remus had finished speaking.  
"Love, I just want to get the full use out of her. Get my money's worth, you know. I do love that bike." Sirius had said.

Which only angered Remus further, because Sirius had told the bike he loved it every single day. It'd been three days since Remus had heard those words directed at him. If it was possible to marry an inanimate object, Remus was sure Sirius would have been at the alter days ago, his precious Lola at his side.

There was no point in pressing the issue with Sirius. He would just continue to dismiss it, and it would lead into another argument. Another argument would only drive Sirius further away, more into the non-existent arms of his precious Lola. There really was nothing Remus could do to convince Sirius he was having an affair with a motorcycle, and that Remus was growing more jealous and possessive each day. Even when he tried to find a new way to word it, 'Oh, Sirius, you're cheating on me with your bike' still sounded like Remus had lost his mind and joined the realm of the wackadoodles.

So, Remus did the only thing he could do. He gave up his morals, and defied his fears, something he was used to doing for Sirius. He was going to intrude on Sirius's time with Lola by being with Sirius when Sirius was with Lola.

If that meant riding the damn thing, so be it. This was war!

And even though it was with something that couldn't technically fight back, Remus was still determined not to lose.

The next time Sirius had a day off, and was preparing to ride off into the sunset with his precious Lola, Remus called out to him.

"Wait!"

Sirius clicked off the engine, a bit irritated.

"What, not this about me and Lola shit again?" Sirius's voice did not mask his agitation.

"No, I just...wanted to come with you." Remus swallowed hard. Though he was used to swallowing his pride, he was having a hard time telling Sirius how excited he was to do something he most certainly did not want to do. "Like..er...one of those romantic, spontaneous trips?"

Sirius sat in silence for a minute, then grinned so far it almost touched his ears, which is only a slight exaggeration. He patted behind them, and clicked the bike back on.

Groaning inwardly at what he'd managed to get into this time, Remus stepped forward and took his seat being Sirius. The engine was causing him the bounce, and he found his arms wrapped around Sirius tightly in order to keep still.

"Well?" Sirius yelled over the engine's noise.

"It's..um...comfortable..." Remus yelled back.

Sirius didn't wait for more. After all, this was a once in a lifetime chance, and waiting could leave Remus time to chance his mind. He shoved off, neglecting to tell Remus that the bike had flying capability, and sent the bike into the air...

And Remus into screams of terror. He didn't anticipate the bike could fly, and his first thought as he soared into the air was that they had crashed instantly and were flying into heaven. When he realized he was still very much alive, he still didn't stop screaming.

Sirius chuckled, but it went unheard over Remus and the engine combined. Honestly, it wasn't that bad. Remus was making it out like it was hell on earth. He gently glided Lola onto the road, a secluded exit that would take them to an abandoned truck stop. There, he could watch the sunset with Remus, and show the werewolf just how much he appreciated him.

Of course, he would have to get Remus to stop screaming first, which didn't seem likely. It was cute, though..in a way. Remus's grip on him was positively painful, but at least Remus was on the bike, and that was a start.

The clearing was just ahead, but Sirius was sure that Remus was crying now. He could hear soft whimpers, followed by yelps and sniffles.

"Good, Sweet, Merlin!" Remus wailed as Sirius pulled to a stop in the opening.

"Pleeaaassee..." Remus sobbed, letting out a yelp and then a scream.

"Remus-" Sirius tried, stifling his laughter.

"Oh, Spare me!" Remus yelled, shaking with his sobs.

"Rem-"

"I want to live!" Remus yelled again, which echoed back from the open sky. He had even caused a few nearby birds to fly from their trees.

"REMUS." Sirius snapped.

"W-w-what?" Remus sniffled, his eyes still tightly shut.

"We've stopped, you know." Oh, it was almost too much. Sirius had come close to laughter, but he had managed to hold it in.

Remus blinked his eyes open and looked at his surroundings. "Oh...we'll..." He said softly, sniffling. "So we have."

After clicking the engine off, and pocketing the keys, Sirius got off of the bike and offered Remus his hand. He took it, all too happy to finally slid off the bike. He was shaking like a leaf in the wind, with tear stained cheeks and a reddened nose, poor thing. What's worse is that he would eventually have to hop back onto the bike to get back home.

Inwardly Remus wondered if the Knight Bus had a route where he was, but then he saw the scenery and lost that train of thought. This abandoned area of land was..beautiful. It was mostly secluded, overcome by overgrown trees, but there were bushes with flowers and blossoms littered the ground. There was an absolute perfect view of the sky. It was wonderful.

"Wow.." Was all Remus could say. He wrapped his arms around Sirius's waist, allowing himself to be lead further into the clearing. He felt as if the sunset filled sky had cast a blanket over them and their hidden place, making sure no one could disturb them. When Sirius came to a log, he pulled away from Remus and sat down, patting the place next to him.

Remus sat next to him, ignoring the fact that he could still clearly see Lola from where he was sitting. He leaned his head on Sirius's shoulder and watched the sun set.

"See? This wasn't too bad." Sirius whispered, though there was no need for him to do so.

"The ride was hell." Remus mumbled indigently.

"Lola's had better."

Remus scoffed. "It is nice, though. This place is beautiful. We could have gotten here without Lola, though." The last part was said softly. Remus really didn't want to fight with Sirius here, in the presence of all this beauty.

"Hmn. Then I wouldn't be able to enjoy the ride with you pressed against my back, your arms tight around me." Sirius countered.

"Good excuse."

The two sat in silence, enjoying the occasional kiss, as the sun dipped below the horizon. When the darkness of night slowly placed it's blanket over them, and when the were done kissing, Sirius stood and made his way over to the bike.

"You can apparate back, if you'd like." He said, sliding himself onto the seat.

"Er, no." Remus was reluctant, but followed suit and got onto the bike.

Sirius didn't bother to ask why Remus wouldn't apparate. He knew he would get some lame excuse about his poor apparation skills, or muggles, when the truth was he just wanted to be with Sirius.

On the ride back home Remus did a lot less screaming, but still made a good fuss. Once they were back at the flat, he was all too happy to get off the bike and head back inside.  
Feeling as though he'd remedied everything, Remus felt like he had been slapped in the face when Sirius chose to stay outside with the bike than come to bed.

Once Sirius was alone, he dug around in the neglected side car. There was a bag in there, a flashlight lacking batteries, and a helmet. Engraved on the front of the helmet, in gold lettering, was the name 'Moony'.

"Eventually..." Sirius mumbled to himself, putting the helmet back where it belonged.

Meanwhile, Remus rolled over in bed.  
"It'll get better eventually.." He told himself.

But he still hated that bike.

-Fin-

**Author's Notes:**  
I hope you enjoyed the story. I would have written more, but I felt like I ended at a good spot. If, after reading this, you feel the need to write, you'll realize there is this handy review button right at the bottom of this page. (Ahem, hint hint.)


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